Let’s pretend I’ve been here all this time, that I didn’t stop writing in this blog for you and let’s start all over again.
Did you notice I changed the picture? I’m sure you did. I was going to use the one you took (which I like better) but that picture is yours and I don’t want to take it from you : ). I love this picture too though. I love the colors and the rusticity of it and I realized that this is the kind of art that I love, the kind of pictures I love to paint (a cream rustic background contrasted with strong punches of color). Have you noticed that? In my writing too is the same (a backdrop that recedes with characters that make everything come alive).
But you know what I love most about this picture? It’s that it reminds me of our mini mother-daughter trip. I had a lot of fun and I hope you did too. I don’t know but I have a feeling it changed a lot of things for you and what you thought you knew about yourself. Like where you come from (meeting new family) and where you want to go (your choice of career). I’m sure, as exciting as it is, it’s also very confusing. And that’s okay, I guess it’s kind of supposed to be that way, otherwise it wouldn’t be fun right? You might make the right choice or you might not. But really, I don’t think choices are supposed to be right or wrong, what they do is they take you to places that are either good for you or they’re not. Drugs and alcohol -> addiction, unemployment, homelessness. Education and hard work -> passion, a job, a home. When you decide on your career (because that’s probably one of your main concerns right now) make that decision based on what makes you feel alive and excited, angry even, not on what you think will bring you a higher social status or a nicer house. Those things will come to you all by themselves if you work hard and with passion. Don’t follow the rules, there is no order of how things are supposed to be. There is no first things first. First is what’s inside you. What’s calling you? You’re in a good time right now, you have no responsibilities other than yourself. You can choose to take whichever path you feel is right for you right now. Will that guarantee that everything will be perfect? That your future will be forever bright? No, not really. But at least you won’t be left in the “what if I had . . .” zone. In the “hubiera” place that is so horrible to live in.
Do. Act. Move forward. Have you made mistakes? Yes. Are you making mistakes? Yes. Will you keep on making mistakes? Yes. There’s no way around that but forward. It’s okay to be afraid and angry. Go ahead and be afraid, be angry (anger can be a propeller, but only if you act). So, make choices and act.
I love this quote by Sandra Cisneros:
“. . . anger when it’s used to act, when used nonviolently, has power.”